captain-snark:

Pining is like porn for me. Imagine Stiles who is like…ridonkulously in love with Derek, but he’s too afraid to tell him. 

Stiles working up the nerve to go through with it when Derek signs up on Tinder or some other dating site. He thinks, okay, maybe now is good, Derek is looking for someone, I could be Someone. 

But then, Derek starts dating, and Stiles is devastated. He gets withdrawn and morose and spends less time around people, particularly Derek. Derek notices of course.

And then there’s maybe this moment where everyone is together and Stiles is sort of overwhelmed just being near Derek in general and he goes and sits out on the McCall’s back porch for some air. 

Derek eventually finds him and sits down on the steps next to him and they sit quietly for awhile before Derek asks Stiles what’s wrong.

Stiles can’t really tell him, but he wants to because it’s eating him up inside. But Derek just gives him a look when Stiles shrugs it off and says he’s fine, it’s nothing. 

Derek bumps their knees together and all Stiles wants to do is tell him everything. So, he settles instead for the truth with some deliberate omissions.

“I…I have feelings for someone,” he says.

“Oh,” Derek says, “and they don’t?”

“I um–well I guess I don’t know? I haven’t actually told them,” Stiles admits. He glances at Derek and then quickly away, afraid he’s going to give himself away. 

“Why not?” Derek asks. Stiles is Stiles and he gives him a look in return. 

“They’re sort of involved,” Stiles says, “and also I’m way too chickenshit.” 

Derek huffs a laugh. “Are you two close?” He asks. 

Stiles thinks about it for a moment before nodding. “We’ve known each other awhile I guess.”

“How long have they been dating?” Derek asks, voice soft, curious.

“I dunno, a few weeks?” Stiles says.

“A few weeks?”

“Yeah, I guess it’s not that long but what if…” Stiles sighs. “I could tell them and they end it with this person, and what if they would have been really happy together? Why should I get to ruin that just because I didn’t ask first?” Stiles says.

Derek is looking at him and Stiles flushes because he’s pretty sure he’s been caught. But Derek is a dumb idiot. 

“How do they know each other?” He asks.

“Through–” Stiles clears his throat “–blind date.”

“So, they barely know each other?”

“Look, when you say it all like this it seems like I should just tell them, but what if it ruins everything?” Stiles is getting all worked up but Derek is sort of grinning at him. “What?!” Stiles huffs.

“You’re sweet, Stiles,” Derek tells him. It’s all fond and gross and Stiles flushes again and his heart starts pounding. 

“No way,” he argues, totally not looking at Derek. 

Stiles doesn’t tell him then. But Derek eventually finds out that it’s him Stiles was talking about and it kind of fucks him up. Because Stiles is so fucked up over him, and he’s never really had anyone that fucked up over him before. 

Stiles is wrecked and sad and it makes that selfish part of Derek sort of thrilled and elated. Maybe he’s never really thought about Stiles like that before, not really, but then suddenly he finds it impossible to see him any other way. Everything about him becomes unbearable. 

He’s always been…attracted to Stiles…in that way you are when you know someone is good looking even though you aren’t…you know…but now Derek’s heart starts pounding every time he sees Stiles, when Stiles looks at him. 

He breaks it off with the woman he’s been seeing, obviously. They really have been only seeing each other for a few weeks. It’s not a tragedy or anything. And then Derek asks Stiles out.

Stiles is sort of floored and suspicious and Derek can’t help but wonder how it took so long for him to actually realize they’ve been heading to this point the whole time. Stiles has always been this bizarre anomaly, this obnoxious, yet selfless little shit that was willing to put everything on the line for him. Derek was always sort of too guarded to see it.

Now though, they’re both so gone for each other.